Lifelines

To a big boy bath seat, that is!

Oh, how he loved this! I couldn’t fully capture on camera his sheer and utter delight at his new bathing position. Upright and able to catch the water falling from the spout. Using his big (really big) mitts to grab a toy floating by. He splashed and cooed and squealed, nearly tipping the seat over more than once in his zealous attempt at another handful of water. Once I turned the spout off, he kept looking back over at it, hoping to find more of the delicious stuff into which he could dip his hands. Remaining unlucky, he settled for chewing on a cup. :)

He did have a bathing mate who was largely uninterested in his sweetness. She was busy pouring water from cup to cup, as she always does. The girl can move some water around, I tell ya.

Inspired by our recent trip to Slate Run Farm where they played on those stilts, the boys convinced Charlie to whip out his power tools and customize a few sets for them to hobble around on out here. I’ve been trying to locate the “Hoop-and-Stick” that Rhyse loved and I just can’t seem to find it. If the weather is nice this weekend, we may cruise up to Amish country and browse their General Stores as, come on, who else would have a bounty of wood not-sold-on-Amazon toys if not the Amish? Plus, we love those towns and it would make for a great Saturday outing for us.

Also attached are a few photos from last night. Family dinners around here are just that…typically a full-on family event! The kids love to help Charlie in the kitchen and I cycle them through baths at the same time. A friend of ours, a Mommy to five small ones, recently had surgery so we made a super-sized dinner, enough for our family of six, plus plenty for me to drop off to her family of seven. It was like Thanksgiving! (And fittingly, we made turkey and mashed potatoes…)

I think posting that photo of the boys the other day was a subconscious way of soothing myself. Because things are changing around here and while I understand what’s going on, it’s very difficult to watch it happen.

The boys are and have always been close. And it is my eternal hope that they always will be. But the reality also is that they are nearly five years apart, though they’ve bridged that age gap far better than I ever thought possible. They truly are best friends.

But…Chas is growing up. He’s now eleven and he’s developing his own interests, ideas, and friendships that do not include his little brother. Rhyse does not understand this, can’t fathom why, when for years Chas has been happy to play cars with him, suddenly he will not. He doesn’t want to play Army men, Star Wars, or any of the other things they used to play together. It’s bewildering to Rhyse and heart-breaking for me.

Last night, for example, Rhyse begged to sleep in the basement as this is his idea of a treat. They do typically sleep down there on Saturday nights and we seldom pester them as it’s “their” time. They watch movies, play Playstation, have popcorn, stay up late. Rhyse really, really looks forward to this.

Chas, however, was not interested in that plan. He had just purchased a new iPod and had spent quite a bit of time getting it the way he wanted it. Time that Rhyse complained about but allowed him (kind of). At some point, I did tell Chas to wrap it up, head for bed, etc. And he says, “I’m not sleeping in the basement.” I didn’t think so much of it right then, waved them off, “whatever, just get in one of your beds,” and then I saw Rhyse.

He looked absolutely crushed. He argued back and forth with Chas, pleaded with him, whined, finally got angry. Came to me, wanting me to make it right for him. And I tried, I spoke with Chas and listened to his reasons (no real reason, just really didn’t want to) and I did explain that Rhyse really was looking forward to it. But he really didn’t want to and I didn’t think that I should make him.

So Chas went to up to bed and Rhyse pouted for a bit downstairs with me. He fought back tears (so hard to watch him struggle) but was clearly very upset. I took him up to his bed, did a few things, thought about him a little, went back up to their room. He was lying in the dark, eyes wide and wet, staring at the ceiling. I climbed in and hugged him, held him. Told him that I understood, I knew he was very disappointed and that I was sorry that it didn’t work out. Maybe next week? He hugged me back, whispered, “Mommy? Do I have to go to Chas’s soccer tomorrow?” I said that he did not and he seemed to feel better. Was this his way of taking from Chas, hurting him also? As in, well, your stuff isn’t important to me, either? I don’t know. I’m just going with it, trying to accommodate both boys here and trying to lessen the blows that adolescence is beginning to deliver.

We’ve always known this would happen, of course it would. But honestly, it’s like a slow, painful breakup. Some days are good, normal, everyone is happy. But just as quickly things aren’t good, feelings are hurt, they’re arguing, neither one is satisfied. And I’m constantly stuck in the middle. They do try to work things out on their own but it usually escalates until I’m stepping in, not because I want to, but because I can’t tolerate another minute of bickering. I feel a need to provide space for Chas but also to help ease Rhyse through. I can not take sides, can not even really push one way or another…can only encourage them both to try to be understanding, kind and patient with each other. This is unchartered territory for all of us.

This bothered me all night, I laid awake just thinking. Seeing Rhyse lying there in the dark, still angry, so disappointed…staring at the ceiling. But, as is the norm around here…all was forgiven by dawn. Rhyse was fine, Chas was fine. They played happily together all morning, then schedules dictated that they split up and do their own thing for the afternoon. Now home from soccer, Chas has joined the kids outside and for the time being…all is well in BrotherLand.

If you’ve been paying attention at all, you know we’ve re-vamped our playthings…pretty much limited to good, safe wooden toys. Most of the new toys we’ve purchased have been online at Oompa and we’ve been really pleased with them.

So imagine my glee when we came across these adorable “Anamalz” at Target, on CLEARANCE! Charlie and I saw them last week but I wasn’t familiar with the brand and wanted to google it before we brought ‘em home and let the kids loose on them.

Google I did and this is what I found out…
They’re made from maple wood, colored with non-toxic water based European paints and assembled with formaldehyde-free glue. In other words…playable. :)

Rather steeply priced online (you can find these exact ones at Oompa for between $6 and $8 an animal) but at Target they were from $3 to $4 each. We cleaned them out, I fell in love with the alligator and the lion, and even went to a second Target to locate the sheep (which I did…last one, sorry.)

Anyway, I thought those of you with small ones might be interested! Hurry, there aren’t many left. We caused such a commotion digging through the shelves that people were stopping and staring…and then digging in too.

My entire family is in bed (even Charlie who is wiped out from a day of errands with the “Fab Five”) so I’m off to organize a bin in the playroom for all these critters.

Happy Weekend!

…is the black hole of time! I sit down to do one thing and four hours later, I’m still here.

Anyway, I wanted to point out a new feature on the side…”My Blogroll.” While I was sucked into cyber-space last night, I did manage to find some other neat blogs (well, I think they’re neat…YMMV). You are able to subscribe to these if you like them or you can just access through my blog whenever you have the time.

Check them out!

We’ve been trying to get out of the house for, oh, three hours now. Middle of the day practice ran long, now lunch is dragging, kids are dropping for naps like flies. It will be a miracle if we get anything done today. We’ll be celebrating Earth Hour huddled in a dark dressing room at Target if we don’t get moving!

Speaking of Earth Hour, don’t forget…tonight at 8:00 (your time), lights out!

I know I’ve posted pictures like this before but whenever they are so sweetly cuddled, I can not resist!

Back when we lived at our last house, the boys had separate rooms yet I would always find them snuggled in one of their beds together…either both in Chas’s room or both in Rhyse’s. I attributed this to not wanting to sleep “alone” in their own room and figured that when we moved and they began sharing a room, it would end.

But they have surprised me! Though their beds are only separated by a dresser, sometime between me putting them to bed and when I do the late night one-last-tuck-in, one has climbed into bed with the other.

This does not bother me (us), in fact, I completely understand it. I don’t like to sleep alone, myself. I was always welcomed into my mom’s bed when I was young and found tremendous comfort there. Since Rhyse, we have adopted the “family bed” (by default, really). We didn’t label it instantly (as in “we family bed”) but our newborns just weren’t happy to be plopped in the crib alone. So we did what quieted them and offered us sleep. We snuggled.

And I’m happy that, for now, this is allowed between them. Because I know, probably soon, it will end. Chas is growing up, faster than I can adjust to each “new” aspect of him becoming a young man, and I know at some point…Rhyse will not be welcomed as openly. We know this will happen, we have ideas for new room assignments when the time comes (Chas will be alone, Rhyse and Creux will share). But until then, I will snap these photos and appreciate these tender moments when I find them wrapped around one another, peacefully sleeping.

As if Slate Run weren’t adventure enough for one day, we did a quick change and took the Bigs out for a special “date night” of their own.

Waaaaay back in December, the boys and I bought tickets to see “STOMP” and stuck them in Charlie’s stocking. Flash forward to three months later and we finally got to see the production.

And what a production it was! Charlie and I had been about 10 years ago and we had really enjoyed it. It hadn’t changed too much though seemed to be much more comical than before…we laughed through the hour and a half long show. We also knew that this would be something the boys would really enjoy seeing and we were right! Chas was hooked from the first broom sweeping entry to the last frenetic beat-on-everything finale. Rhyse was a bit more restless…he liked the show…but he also wanted to climb on Chas, ask me 10,000 questions, HAD to have a drink of water, etc. ;)

They were really cute, participating when the actors encouraged the audience to do so, clapping hands after each rousing performance. I think they have a whole new respect for household items.

Meanwhile, “back at the ranch”, my mom was holding down the fort. This was our very first outing without our little man and I was a bit anxious. But only a bit. He was well-fed and sleeping when I left and I knew he’d be entertained by Memaw if he woke. Greer was delighted to have my mom to herself, no fussing at all when we prepared to leave with her brothers. I had told her it was a “boy thing” so she was completely dis-interested. ;) Instead, she played with my mom and they baked some cookies (which were darn good, by the way).

In the end, Creux didn’t sleep (duh, who didn’t see that coming?) but did fine hanging out until the Milk Maid rolled back into town. ;) It was great to spoil the older boys a bit, too. We’ve got a neat mix of ages between all our kids and it IS rather special to separate them every once in awhile. Plus, we dig doing all this stuff so Charlie and I make out just fine whether we’re at a Wiggles concert or jamming with the boys at STOMP.

The only downside is that I’m sure they’ll be a bit of a fallout concerning my own household accessories. I can literally feel Rhyse eyeing my broom, I know without even looking over my shoulder that he is considering all the fantastic sounds he can make by slamming it down on the floor.

“Rhyse?” I say without turning away from my computer.

“Hmmm?” Distracted, he was lost in deep, deep thought. He also sounds…caught.

“Do not even think about using that broom on my hardwoods.”

“HEEEHEEHEEHEE,” he cackles and races off.

Mmm hmm. I know him too well. Mark my words, there’s a blog entry in his very near future. :)

We spent the afternoon at Slate Run Living Historical Farm with my friend Jenny and her kids. The idea was to head up for a sheep shearing demonstration (we’re always up for educational-sounding events). However, we found it a bit barbaric (a wee smidge TOO educational) and the kids decided they’d rather walk around so that’s what we did.

And I’m so glad we changed our minds! We wandered around and visited all the farm animals. Greer (ever so stylish) loved the ducks but wouldn’t go near any others…though the baby lambs were very tempting, I could tell. She was cold and rather miserable but hung in there with us. (And many thanks to Baby William for allowing her to use his blankey like a coat. :)

The boys, on the other hand, had a wonderful time! They enjoyed getting up close and personal with all the animals and trying out the old-timey outdoor toys. Chas now wants Charlie to build him a set of stilts and Rhyse is requesting the little wheel he was playing with towards the end of the album.

On our way out, we met the oddest little deer, who was just cruising around the parking lot. There were several rangers trying to round him up but before he was caught, he came right up to us! So close was he, in fact, that he almost mowed down Colin, Jenny’s son, who can be seen in the last photo diving for safety!

It was a gorgeous afternoon and I was happy to get out and enjoy the weather. My gang loved stepping back in time for the day.

Well, I was feeling quite springy and now I’m just feeling completely irritated! It’s a new look for the blog though I’m not finished. I think I lost my quotes (damn!) and I need to repost some photos but hopefully I will get it sorted out soon.

Bear with me. Have pulled out remaining chunks of hair that my hormones had kindly left me with.

Bald photo to follow…;)